Why Is the First Call the Hardest To Discuss Bankruptcy?

Posted by Laura L. DonaldsonMay 14, 20200 Comments

Upon the recommendation of one of my many fabulous and wise clients, I listened to a Ted Talk today by Brene' Brown on vulnerability. The relevance of her talk struck home for me. I often think about the struggle that my clients face before they pick up the phone to make that first call to discuss options. We are here to help, so why do so many wait so long to call and get help?

I do appreciate that reaching out to a lawyer for help is one of the most difficult calls a person can make.Will the lawyer be understanding or will they be judgmental? Can I just work a second job to pay back the debt and see my family less? Do I have enough debt? Is my struggle big enough? Will they think I can't manage my finances? These are all questions reflecting the vulnerability in our human nature. As Brene' describes we live in a nation full of vulnerable families struggling with overwhelming debt, obesity, addiction, and homelessness to name a few. Vulnerability is not always a bad thing. It allows people who are miserable by their circumstances to search for bigger purpose and meaning.

Blame is another sign of vulnerability. People blame themselves, blame their spouse, or couples blame each other for their current financial situation. As Brene' explains, blame is a way to discharge pain and discomfort. It doesn't do anyone any good but it makes us feel better. But does it really? Does it resolve or merely prolong the issue? We are all born imperfect and wired for struggle. Elimination of the source of the struggle (overwhelming debt) also eliminates any need for blame.

Courage is a sign that you are authentic. It shows an ability to recognize your vulnerability and accept it. If you are struggling with whether you should call or not, understand that we lawyers are humans like you who face their own daily struggles and issues with vulnerability. We recognize your struggle is real. As a nation, we have to use the laws and tools we are given to provide for the well-being of our families. Bankruptcy is a federal proceeding which allows for debt relief. It was put in place to help you. We have been helping people work through financial issues for over 18 years. We are not here to judge but rather to provide you with compassion, insight and guidance into ways to help you feel some relief from your debt. Let us give you the tools that you need to make an informed decision. You don't have to commit, just listen.

Take the first step and give us a call or email us through our Contact Us form today.